Overcoming driving anxiety
The other day a woman sneezed. On the bus. I felt terrible for her because everyone looked at her like she was a super spreader even though she was wearing a mask. But sometimes, for reasons that have more to do with seasonal allergies than Covid, you have to sneeze. Okay, full disclosure: that woman was me. Suffice it to say, however, I haven’t felt that bad about anything bus-related since I frantically pronounced a man dead in his seat—and he was simply taking a nap.
Often public transportation is really the only sensible way to go in big cities, like my hometown Manhattan. Yet, given the pandemic, not surprisingly being contained in a closed environment with strangers has left many of us less inclined to take it. Therefore, the only other option is an uber-expensive car service—or driving your own car. Nevertheless, pandemic or not, every year millions of people around the country stop driving or end up avoiding certain driving situations due to experiencing driving anxiety and panic. This is even more disruptive for those where public transportation is not readily available or for whom cars are essential as transportation and vital for many jobs. Overcoming driving anxiety and its symptoms can help immensely both in private and in public life.
Alas, there is always an excuse as to why someone is unwilling to drive. Take, for example, my friend Francine. One winter, she was driving to her house in Connecticut and her car hit a patch of ice. Fortunately, neither she nor the car were damaged. But after that, every time she got back in the car she would be overcome with fear that it could happen again.
“I refuse to drive, Jane,” she recently told me. “What if my car hits another ice patch and this time, I won’t be so lucky!”
“But Francine,” I countered. “You now live in San Diego!”
It didn’t matter, actually. The terror was ingrained. And it definitely impacted her SoCal lifestyle. So how do you overcome this irrational fear? I took my query to driving expert Leo Waldenback, Co-Founder and Head of Growth at Zutobi, an online Driver’s education resource that teaches you everything there is about driving and driver safety.
JWM: What exactly is driving anxiety?
LW: Simply said, it’s a fear of driving. And it is more common than most people might think. But while it may be that you select a far longer route with less traffic, which most of us have done at least once, more critically, it can also result in letting the car stand unused in the garage and taking other means of transportation instead.
JWM: It obviously can be stressful for the driver, but can it affect others as well?
LW: It can! Drivers facing anxiety are scared to make the correct choices in traffic and may cause unsafe situations simply by virtue of driving too slowly or defensively. It is well established that driving too slowly can be just as dangerous as speeding.
JWM: Is it possible to overcome driving anxiety?
LW: Absolutely! Millions of people have overcome their anxiety and no longer have any symptoms. There are many things you can do that, together, will make a real difference in reducing your fear of driving and getting better .
That said, here are six pro tips on overcoming driving phobias, courtesy of Leo Waldenback:
1. Get help from a driving instructor
The first and most important tip is that you hire a professional instructor to help you get used to driving in difficult situations, while also improving your driving know how by learning the most up-to-date information. With time, you’ll become more confident in traffic, get used to driving in traffic, and won’t ever be fearful of getting into the car. Even if you think you are a good driver, taking lessons can still help immensely. This is especially important if you haven’t sat behind the wheel for some time.
2. Learn the rules of the road
In addition to taking lessons with a driving instructor, you’ll want to memorize the rules of the road. If you know exactly what to do in each situation, and how others will act, you will feel much more confident in traffic. It can also drastically reduce the risk of an accident , which should, in turn, reduce your driving anxiety over time. For example, safe driving skills help you maintain a proper following distance to vehicles in front of your car, which means you won’t need to brake or change lanes as often.
3. Practice
It may sound harsh to suggest that people who experience anxiety while driving should sit behind the wheel, but the more you practice, the better a driver you will become and the less stressful driving will feel. Driving anxiety often relates to feeling inadequate in a car. You should see that your driving anxiety lessens the more you get used to handling your car in traffic— and the more comfortable you will feel as a driver. I suggest that you begin by practicing on quiet streets with little traffic and gradually move to busier roads. That way, you’ll have a smooth transition into the types of conditions that are usually the hardest if you have driving anxiety or fear of driving in general. Focus on feeling relaxed and calm and free.
4. Meditate
For some, finding a way to simply let go of your worries can do wonders. Meditation is a time when you can fully relax and clear your head. A few minutes at home may be all it takes to unwind.
5. Seek Therapy
If your fear of driving is based on a real-life event like being involved in an accident or seeing someone else hurt in an accident, perhaps therapy is the key. Finding the root of the problem can help you overcome your anxiety the fastest. Many people with driving anxiety hold it inside themselves rather than talk about it. Therapy will help you face your fear by discussing it with someone who can help you unravel what exactly it is you are scared of. In many cases, therapy leads to an understanding that there is nothing to be afraid of by dismantling the fear one step at a time.
6. Do It Your Way
If something works for you, or you need time, do it your way. It’s a process of eliminating what doesn’t work and finding what does. All this may take time, but you’ll get there as long as you keep at it.
At the end of the day, from all the years of writing about anxiety and conducting on air interviews with therapists, I know for a fact that if there is a particular day-to-day situation that makes you anxious and even can cause a panic attack, the worst thing you can do is to completely avoid it, thereby disrupting your life. And the best thing is to (gradually) face it head-on by practicing being in that situation as much as you can. The more you confront it, the easier it will get. I promise. Note to Francine: Please don’t wait until in snows in La Jolla to get behind the wheel.
For more information visit Zutobi.com.
